She Whom I Think of Is Far Away
by Cai Yue
The mountains are high; the moon is small. The moon is small, but so delicate it is. She whom I think of is far away; My heart aches if I don't see her every day.
He couldn't remember how he ended up sitting in this movie theater. Wang Hai-tao only remembered he stumbled out of the International Student Services of his school, his face covered with tears and his ears full of the unquestionable No's from the Service personnel. The next thing he remembered, he watched a rare movie in the theater named The Boat of Texas: Over one hundred Americans were standing in line there. All had filled their pockets with Stars and Stripes banners. He looked up and the huge words on the theater's poster sign fell into his eyes: "New Release: Independence Day." On the movie screen were skyscrapers, nude dancers, the Senate and UFOs that he had seen only in video games. Sitting next to him were the Americans who held their breath and tightened their fists; they were extremely anxious about human destiny and human resistance against the evil extraterrestrial invasion. "Ah," he vaguely sighed, "this is real America. It is a pity, though, this is not my motherland." Then his mind was occupied by things in the past. Misty cloud started to rise in front of him. Behind the cloud was the polished stone path washed clean after the rainy season. Xiao Qing's high heel shoes hit the stone path creating a crisp and rhythmic sound. Her long hair spread over her shoulders, framing her delicate eyes and curved eyebrows. Xiao Qing's tears had soaked his entire shoulder. She declared that she really couldn't stand his leaving her right after their marriage. He caressed her long hair and said, "In six months, I will see to it that you come to America too. Promise!" In less than six months, he went to the school's International Student Services and asked for an application form for the F-2 visa, which was intended for spouses of I-20 students. He could not bear it any longer. In the house he shared with four other students, his thoughts were filled with her -- her frowns, her smiles, her long hair, and even her fragrance. "Tao, my visa application was rejected in Shanghai. The reason was your financial support was not strong enough." Before Xiao Qing finished calling these abrupt words into the phone, she began to weep. His hand that carried the receiver started to shiver. Then he took a series of steps. He went to see his department chair and asked if he could increase his work hours so that his scholarship amount could be raised. The department chair shook his head. He went to see his professor and hoped he would provide financial sponsorship. His professor refused, as providing financial sponsorship required disclosure of private property including liquidation property and real estate property, savings and investment status. Indeed a violation of privacy. "Get a new passport; then try again in Beijing." It was a weekend. He could hardly say a word to Xiao Qing at the other end of the phone line. He could almost see her tiny figure thousands of miles away, carrying a bag of money and running around in Beijing, knocking at every single door where help might be found, begging. She got the new passport. In China these days, there was hardly anything that you were not able to buy. An American visa, however, was one of the very few items that were not for sale. "Tao, I got rejected again. This time they said I had intentions to immigrate." Xiao Qing wept aloud. This time, his heart fell cold. "Maybe there is a way out," he thought that night with tears covering his face. The next day, he went to the International Students Services. He requested that they issue him a new I-20 form and raise his scholarship amount on the form. "This is cheating!" The personnel in the Services stared him with disbelief. "Please! Please!" he begged. This was his last hope! His knees started to give way and he almost fell down. The Services personnel looked at him with sympathy but they held their position: "Sorry, we cannot do what is illegal." "Is it really hopeless?" He hid himself in the darkness of the movie theater and asked himself with desperation. At this time, the movie screen showed the firm face of the American president, who was broadcasting his proclamation before the counter attack: "We must not be quietly devoured by darkness. We must not surrender without a fight ¡K We must live. We must win¡K Independence Day will not be a holiday for American people alone¡K" Everybody in the theater stood up with excitement and they all shouted: "Yes! Yes!¡K"Except for him, the lonely Chinese, whose hysterical weeping was unheard amid the thunderous cheers. The movie was over. Wang Hai-tao walked out of the theater absent-mindedly. Then to his surprise, he heard a greeting in fairly good Chinese: "How do you do!" He looked back and saw a white-haired old man looking at him with smiles. "You know Chinese?" Wang asked with surprise. "Yes," the old man replied, "I do. Half a century ago, I went to China and fought the anti-Japanese war under the leadership of General Jonathan. In an air attack, my fighter plane was hit by the Japanese. I parachuted out and fell into a mountainous village. The people in the village hid me. Later on they put me on a little donkey and walked me for one month into Chinese-occupied territory, where I married a Chinese lady. I brought her to America when the war was over. Unfortunately, she passed away more than ten years ago, leaving me here alone. Young man, why did you cry so loudly in the theater?" Wang briefly told the old man his story. He brought out a picture of Xiao Qing, which he always carried with him. Behind the picture was a poem Wang had written. Wang read to the old man softly:
Ask the world what love can really be That will bind two hearts together as one,, Even though they may be far apart."
The old man looked at the picture and said, "What a lovely Chinese woman. And how wonderful that you love each other so much! Would you like to come to my home? Maybe I can help you in some way." That night Wang stayed at the old man's home until midnight. The old man's name was Peter Oakman. Wang told him in detail of the romance he shared with Xiao Qing, including the precious memory of his new bride and his present heart-breaking agony. The old man in return showed Wang various Chinese decorations in his house and told Wang of his never-ending loneliness and his memories of his deceased wife. At last, the old man volunteered to sponsor Xiao Qing. "God has given me sufficient property because He wants me to help the needy," he said. The only thing the old man asked in return was he hoped Wang would come to see him every weekend and read the Chinese Bible to him for one hour. "When my wife was living, she read to me every day." The old man said, his eyes glistening with tears. The sponsorship documents were mailed to China, but the old man's property did not make a difference. The officer in the U.S. Consul glanced at the sponsorship documents and quickly returned them to Xiao Qing. The authorities did not believe nor trust this kind of sponsorship. "Maybe I can explain to them," the old man said when Wang told him what had happened. He sat down and quickly typed a letter making two copies. "I will mail one copy directly to the Consul in Shanghai. You need to mail the other copy to your wife and ask her to take it to the Consul and give it the officer there. I have written in the letter that I am a Christian and that I have been an honest person throughout my life. My sponsorship is real. Besides, I have worked for the federal government before; they will have to believe me." Two weeks later, news came from Xiao Qing in Shanghai: They still rejected her! Wang sat in the old man's living room without a word. "I swear by my white hair that I must go to Shanghai and speak to them face to face," the old man said with a bit anger. "God never likes to see husbands separating from their wives. Those visa officers! May the Lord forgive these young men! They don't know what they are doing. I am almost eighty-years-old now, and I am more than willing to go and teach them how to obey the Lord. I would also like to go and see China again. Hai-tao, let us pray to the Lord together. God will help us. I have lived many years, and I know whatever we do we need to submit ourselves to Him. You must believe Him too." "I do, I do." Wang replied. As long as Xiao Qing could come here, he would believe in whatever he was asked to! The old man headed for Shanghai. Living in anxiety was extremely difficult. It was a torture! Every night, Wang waited next to the phone. He also prayed every day, following the old man's advice. He even went to the chapel at school. He wanted to utter a vow before the Cross: "Oh God, if only you let Xiao Qing come to America, I will surely believe in you." But as he was standing there, his heart shivered as if it were hit by lightning. Then a completely different prayer came right out of his mouth: "Oh God, heavenly Father, I have heard of you in the past, but now I have truly experienced you. You are right there with Peter the old man. You are right there, and there forever. You have taken my helpless hand, and I pray that you will not let go of it ¡K"One week later, Xiao Qing finally called again. "Tao ¡K" She could not continue but began to cry loudly. "Oh no!" his head began to quiver. "We did it!" Xiao Qing, however, continued in broken words. "Peter is really a good man. He took me to the Consul. We didn't even have to stand in the line¡K You know how little English I know. I only heard a few words between Peter and the officer, words like God, husband, and wife. The officer's face changed color a few times but he eventually approved it¡K Peter said he would bring me to America soon¡K"Hanging up, Wang stood still. Then he quickly dashed toward the Chapel. In front the Cross where he had uttered his prayer three days before, he knelt down and said in a low voice, "Oh God ¡K" |