The Chain Effect

I had never imagined how bothersome it could be to have dinner with Christians. After this whenever I received this kind of dinner invitation, I always turned it down... I didn't want to go and I didn't have the courage to go.

By Huang Li-xin

"Underground" spies

Over two years ago, my wife was preparing to come to America as a visiting scholar. One of our friends in America called us to congratulate her. He also told her, "You're heading to the southern part of America, and there's a strong Christian influence there." He warned my wife not to fall prey to it. We didn't pay much attention to his warning because we didn't believe that Christianity would have much connection with our life and studies. Soon after my wife left for America... She wrote to me that she had received a lot of help from a local Chinese church and that people at the church were praying for me and my son to obtain our American visas in good time.

I was moved when I read this. I often talked with friends about my wife's situation in America, and I also mentioned that Christian churches had given a lot of help to the overseas students. An elderly friend of mine reminded me however, "When you go to America, be sure not to get involved in church activities. Stay away from Christians. It's possible that there are American or Taiwanese spies lurking in the churches and you may fall into the clutches of their organizations before you know it." I was a bit scared when I heard this.

I make no choice

Soon afterwards my son and I arrived in America. A few days later, someone called to invite us to church. I found it hard to refuse and anyway I was curious to find out what Christians really did at church. So I went with him. It was an American church of almost one thousand people. Sitting in the congregation, I found myself deeply attracted by the lovely music and hymns. But I could not understand a single word of the sermon. Six or seven times I had to stand up with others to pray and sing, and I felt awkward and uneasy. The atmosphere, however, made a good impression on me. The people at the church were pious, sincere and friendly. They shook hands with us and welcomed us as newcomers.

When the service was over, our friend said he would like to take us to their Bible study group. After lunch, a theological student came over to share the Gospel with me. He quoted John 3:16: "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." He drew a cross on a piece of paper. On the left side he wrote the word sin and on the right he wrote eternal life. He said that I was living in sin and I could only be saved, set free from sin and gain eternal life by trusting in God's love and the salvation of the cross. He also said, "Right now you have two choices before you. One is to continue living your life of sin, and the other is to accept Jesus as your personal Savior so that you are set free from sin to live as a Christian. This is the way to gain eternal life."

I was a bit offended. This person has gone too far. I only met you five minutes ago and you are already calling me a sinner. You know nothing about me as a person or about my past history, and yet you have already passed judgement on me as a sinner. Moreover, this God you have just talked about is invisible and intangible. I should really be laughing at you for your ignorance, but here you are calling me a sinner. If you really want to persuade me to join your organization, you should at least show me some respect.

So I replied politely, "I don't want to make a choice one way or the other because I know nothing about Christianity, nor do I really want to." I also quoted to him Confucius' saying , "If you do not know about life, how can you know about death". I can't even be certain about my own life and future. So why should I start unrealistically worrying about where I will go after I die? Don't I have enough worries right now?

I didn't want to go on arguing with him. So I stopped there, "Actually, I have only just arrived in America and I'm still suffering from the time difference. I'm tired and I want to go home." So I went home without going to their Bible study group. Back home, I advised my wife to keep away from the church. There was nothing in it for us. I reminded her that our goal in America was to make our own dreams come true, not to study the Bible. I'd rather study English.

A bothersome dinner

Our friends called us again and each time I refused. I said I didn't have the time. After a while, they started inviting me home for dinner. I didn't expect that they would talk about the Bible at the dinner table. And I did, after all, want to make some friends. So I agreed to go.

The dinner was great and the atmosphere relaxed. Christianity was not one of the topics of conversation. After dinner, when we went to sit in the living room, our host suggested that we read the Bible. Oh no! I said to myself. But I couldn't just get up and go, because my home was about twenty miles away. At that time we had no car and it was our host who had driven us to the dinner. It looked as if we wouldn't be able to get home without studying the Bible. So reluctantly I sat down.

I sat it out patiently enough till the end, but then our host suggested that we should pray for each other. Oh no! things were getting out of control. I had always thought it was ridiculous the way that Christians talked to the air, but now they were making me do it too. However could I get out of this? So I protested that I didn't know how to pray. My hostess said I should give it a try, and whatever ideas or requests I might have, I could express them to Him in prayer.

When it came my turn to pray, my mind went completely blank and I couldn't remember a single word of what I had prepared to say. A couple of minutes of silence elapsed before I finally found these words to say, "Oh Lord, I pray for you to help me do what I want to do." It was a very naive prayer and even now I find it a bit ridiculous. When I got home, I complained to my wife about how bothersome it was having dinner with Christians. When I later received similar dinner invitations, I refused them all. I didn't want to go and I didn't dare to.

The language school teacher

I went to a language school to study English. The American teachers in the school showed great patience and love to all of us, coming as we did from different countries and speaking different languages. Soon I was told that they were all Christians. One of the teachers was a grandmother, and she used to remember all of our birthdays. Besides teaching us English, she also gave us occasional surprises during recess by bringing in a birthday cake with lit candles on it and singing the Happy Birthday song to the birthday student. We were all very fond of her. If I occasionally missed class, she would always call me at home and ask if I needed any help. I was very touched.

When I was told that her husband was a pastor I felt a great surge of respect for her. Because of her, I gradually overcame my prejudice against Christianity and Christian believers. I could really sense in her the Christian love which I had always looked for and never found. But now here I could at last experience this kind of love.

During that period I met a lot of loving Christians. Through them I gradually came to know God's love and I began to read the Bible. My Bible had been given to me by my Christian friend and I had never read it before, but now I really wanted to understand the God that Christians worship. I wanted to know how God was able to make so many people in the world, including some really famous ones, humble themselves to worship Him.

In comparison to these famous people, I felt I so insignificant. Humbly I went along to the church again to attend the Sunday worship services and Bible studies. I also read a lot of Christian books and joined in evangelistic activities. I was astounded when I read about the life of Jesus. During his three years of ministry, Jesus completely changed the course of human history. In all history there has been no-one else like him. Only the Lord Jesus, through his own sufferings and death, can bring peace and new life to the world.

Under the pastor's guidance, I prayed and accepted the Lord Jesus Christ as my personal Savior. Soon I joined discipleship training classes, and through them I systematically learned the truth of Christ and realised that Christianity not only provides the answers in terms of religious belief but it also solves life's problems. In the past I used to feel offended when someone called me a sinner; but now I realize that I am indeed a sinner because of my sinful nature. Although I may never have committed any crimes, there are evil desires deep in my heart, like greed and the pursuit of worldliness, fame and vanity. These evil desires have brought me tremendous burdens and pressures.

Since I believed in the Lord, worldly values have now become less important to me. My mind has become clearer and I am much happier than I used to be. Whenever I got problems, my prayers to the Lord help reduce my mental stress. Whenever I run into temptation, I can look to the Lord and He becomes my shield and my refuge. In the past I did not want to go to church and I did not want to get to know Christians, but now I really enjoy going to all the worship services and fellowship gatherings. I also have opportunities to serve the Lord.

I am really happy that I have found the Lord. At the same time I am concerned about my nation and my unbelieving friends around me. I hope that I may be able to live such a true Christian life that, like the Christians who influenced me, I may influence those who do not believe. May this Christian influence become a chain effect!

The author came from Shanghai. He now lives in Edmonton, Canada.